two things that happened to me today

Item: I burned my hand badly, with soup, immediately before taking an exam. I did this to myself in a community college cafeteria. Have you ever tried this? I recommend it, especially the part where you then have to walk around the cafeteria with your hand throbbing for like five minutes before you can get out and put it under cold water, or, indeed, wipe the hot soup off of it at all. Well, by then it's cold soup. And did I mention the eighteen-year-olds looking at you pityingly? So, as you can see, this is a great way to get your full weekly diet of pain and humiliation in one fell swoop.

Item: After taking my exam and then sitting through another hour of class with my hand smarting like the devil, I returned to my car to find a $150 parking ticket, because I haven't put my new registration sticker on since I renewed it in February.

I've been busy, okay? Christ.