nnngh, part 2

Well, it turns out there's not going to be a term paper after all. So that's good.

But now I'm trying to write my personal statement for my UCSB application, which is due on Thursday, and oh my god I can't I can't I can't.

Q: How did your interest in your field develop?
A: Organically; hopelessly; appallingly; unstoppably. I was a friendless child, and words comforted me as if they were tiny fuzzy puppies, or Jesus. It took a pathological turn from there. I now find myself completely unable to go without consuming words for more than a few hours at a time. Withdrawal symptoms include mind-shattering boredom and an inability to believe that anything good could ever happen to me.

Q: What have you gained from your involvement in your field?
A: Knowledge of a lot of words, and how to spell them. Near-supernatural proofreading ability.

Q: Tell us about a talent, experience, contribution or personal quality you will bring to the University of California.
A: Did I mention the proofreading thing? Yeah, that. I can also belch pretty loudly, and I'm much, much smarter than you. Plus I promise to ride a bike across campus wearing a skirt and no underwear every once in a while. Just let me in already, will you?