a meta moment, or, welcome to my blog!

Hi there. Welcome! As you probably already know if you're reading this, I have made the decision &mdash after much quailing and beating of my brow &mdash to tell people that this blog exists. Yes, okay, so every time I look back on what I’ve written so far, I become more and more convinced that I’m a mildly retarded twelve-year-old boy. I don't feel like I'm doing very well with this, and in fact I’m consistently breaking every single rule I’ve tried to set for myself after reading other people’s blogs (e.g., don’t talk about yourself constantly, don’t talk about your blog at all, don’t be too wordy, say interesting things, blah blah blah), but whatever! I don't care! Because I am really fucking enjoying it!

A little while ago, while still trying to decide what to do, I made a list of the pros and cons of coming out as a blogger. But logic is quite foreign to my decision-making process and so it all seemed a little beside-the-point by the time I was finished. Then I asked myself, what would Jesus do? No, seriously, I asked myself that. My answer to myself was, “I’m guessing glow faintly and stare at you all creepy-like with his laser eyes. Probably also not swear as much as you.” That motherfucking Jesus is never any help.

Anyway, at some point during all this horsing around, I decided to tell people, largely because it's ridiculous not to, if only because no one really cares enough to justify me being all top secret about it. So... welcome, friends! Don’t feel like you have to read all the archives about how shitty that one day was for me and how cute I think Jude Law is. (Although FYI I'm totally over him now. It was the stripper that did it. He's not exactly dead to me now, he's just no longer allowed to speak to me.) Just one request: please try not to desert me completely when you realize what a fucking idiot I really am, okay?