Monday, May 19, 2008

@&$#)*!*@&#*!

I just found out that at the end of this week my department at work is moving (within the building) back to the space it was in a year ago. Only this time, the CEO and his Renfield are going to be in there with us. Fitting both CEO and Renfield into the area means our department has to be split up, so one member will be downstairs now, but never mind that, because that's just the beginning of the mind-bogglingly bad organization.

The CEO being there means my department manager doesn't get an office, because the CEO takes the only one there. (And it goes without saying that I will no longer have an office, like I do now.) So my boss gets the biggest, nicest desk, with the most window exposure, which is fine; it used to be my old desk, before the company decided it didn't like me and screwed me several times over, but she's my boss and she can have it.

Then Renfield gets the next best desk, also next to a window, because of course he got to pick ahead of the rest of us, since he's a hard-core sexist knob. (Seriously, he recently told one of my co-workers, in so many words, that he thinks women should be subject to men because the Bible says so. He's also utterly incompetent, which is why he's been made the CEO's valet, because god knows they can't fire incompetent fuckwads around here if they're male.) Renfield's new desk happens to be the one farthest from the CEO's new office, which means that the two of them will be shouting back and forth to each other across my and my co-worker's heads. As for me, I will be sitting at the desk immediately outside the CEO's office — I'm only part-time now, because the CEO decided to try to fire me a few months ago and only half-succeeded, so I get the shittiest desk. It is the shittiest desk not least because my computer screen will be clearly visible to three of the four people in the area at all times, including the CEO, which means no more blog reading for me.

And last but not least, the CEO is an enormous mountain of a man who is always hot and likes to set the thermostat to 67 degrees. I am always cold and would be very happy most days with the it set to 77. The situation won't be helped by the fact that the CEO's new office is so badly-ventilated that every time the heat is turned on it's like a sauna in there within five minutes. So there will be constant thermostat conflict, which I will lose every goddamned time, because obviously it's not as important for me to be physically comfortable as it is for the CEO to be physically comfortable, and therefore any compromise is out of the question.

Swear words.


P.S.: To compensate you for reading all that, here is a picture of a baby wombat named Sid Vicious.

And did you know that echidnas have backward-facing rear feet? What the fuck, seriously.

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